Doing Hard Things

A few years ago, I delivered some muffins to a lady who I knew from church. When I dropped off the muffins at her house, she oohed and ahhed and said, "How did you make these? It would have taken me all morning to make...and then I would have needed a nap to recover." I remember thinking really? I just whipped these up. It was no big deal at all. I make these at least once a week.

The strange thing was - she wasn't just being nice and saying nice things. She was really telling me the truth. Making muffins for her was hard.

I've been thinking about those muffins and that conversation lately. The lady's comments made me realize that just because something is easy for me, doesn't mean it is easy for everyone.  And even though that idea seems self-evident (a duh! kind of thought), I sometimes forget and then that gets me in trouble.

Let me explain. A couple months ago, my husband and I decided it was time to push Leasie a bit harder and a bit further with her violin. Up till then, she had taken individual lessons and practiced on her own. But we felt that it was time for her to join an after school orchestra and add group lessons. 

When we proposed the idea, Leasie was terrified and flat-out refused. I was so surprised. For me, music lessons and after school activities were easy, even enjoyable experiences. We were offering her an opportunity - but she saw it as some kind of punishment. I confess, I wasn't very sympathetic.

After one particularly difficult conversation with Leasie, I found myself remembering the lady and the muffins. Maybe orchestra and group lessons for Leasie were like the muffins for the lady. Easy for me - but hard for someone else. Maybe I needed to be more understanding and try to work with Leasie instead of assuming and pushing so hard.

So we addressed some of her fears (aka bought her a cell phone so she would feel safe), we talked through scenarios, and after lots of reassurance, we signed her up. The first couple weeks of her orchestra lessons were down right hard. There were tears. But she was brave. 

Now fast forward to two weeks ago, when Leasie did another hard, scary thing. She and her orchestra group boarded a bus and came to the high school to play in the annual Strings Bash.

It was a fabulous concert - and not just because of the music. It was a thrill to watch Leasie and Madi play together. But it was thrilling mostly because I knew of the personal fears Leasie had faced in order to get to that point.  

 

 Do you see Leasie's shy smile? Yep, she's scared to death, but willing to try.

Do you see Madi's "please don't take my picture" smile? I took it anyway.

Can you see that "I did it" smile on Leasie's face? I can.

Muffins. Orchestra. Hard things. I'm so proud of my girls for being willing to do hard things.