Spring oh spring oh spring!

After living for three years in tropical weather (cold in Indonesia is when temperatures dip into the 70s), I had mixed feelings about winter. On the one hand, three years is a long time to go without enjoying snow, and snow is soooo much fun. On the other, cold temperatures really mess with psyche. Winter affected my exercise regimen, my eating habits, our utility bills, and our family recreational activities. However, there's nothing quite like a cold winter that makes me truly appreciate the feel of sunshine on my face, the first purple and yellow crocuses, and the teasing warm weather of those first few days of spring.

In the past couple weeks, we've found time to enjoy the first signs of spring.

Elise picked this miniature bouquet during our Harper's Ferry day.   

These kids looked like spring flowers Easter Sunday, turning their faces to the warm sun. They lingered in the yard long after the Easter eggs had all been found.

Between waking to a yard full of candy-filled eggs as a surprise by an anonymous friend (Schoney's??) and the Easter feast of yumminess...I love these signs of spring.

Just yesterday we snatched a quick visit to Ida Lee park because the weather was so very inviting. The trees and giant rocks were more tempting than the playground. So I boosted, cheered, and caught kids as they climbed trees and scrambled on the rocks. Watching Charlotte, I couldn't believe how grownup she seems. Gone are chubby legs and Buda-belly of toddlerhood. She is lengthy like her sisters. I guess while I've been hibernating this winter, she's been growing.

 

Even the spring rain has its benefits. On a cool morning run, the sprinkles felt like soft kisses and brought this beautiful sight. 

No matter what the weather, I love spending time with my children. That time together feels more precious lately with all our activities pulling us in different directions. 

Welcome Spring! Welcome sunshine! Welcome crocuses, daffodils, and tulips! Welcome robins! 

I have missed you!

A Race, a Conert, and a House

The weather did not cooperate with our March 14th Lucky Leprechaun race, but we were not deterred! We brought garbage bags to wear while standing in the heavy rain before the race, and we packed a dry change of clothes for post race.

Elise won 1st place in her age group, and I got 3rd in my age group. But my favorite moments of the race was running next to two 10-year-old boys who purposefully splashed in the biggest puddles, breakfast with Karen and Elise (the orange tea hit the spot!), and Elise snagging an entire grocery bag of green bagels after the race ended.  Score!

 More joy: a concert with my girls! We went to Jammin Java in Vienna to see Taylor Barrett.

 The only thing better than good music...sharing it with friends!!

I have to celebrate these moments because really, March has been a challenging month. Hang-ups with our house construction, lice (yes lice! yes it sucked), a broken washing machine (the same week as the lice - oh yes, it was epic!), cold cold weather, conflicts with some crazy things at school, and altogether feeling stretched too thin with basically all parts of my life.

So a race, a concert, and seeing some progress on the house make me feel happy.

Madi at 15

She wakes up on her own and gets ready for school without complaint. She urges me to hurry so she will be on time for seminary. 

She loves blueberry muffins, pumpkin muffins, white bread, peanut butter ice cream and chocolate chip cookies (especially the dough). For her birthday "cake" she requested pecan sticky buns.  She still does not like mixed food or food with sauce.

She plays the cello and is at this point, basically self-taught with the piano. She's made incredible progress to learn hymns and beautiful lyrical music. She will sit at the piano for hours just playing and playing. My favorite songs to hear her play are from the movie soundtrack of "Pride and Prejudice."

 She studies without needing any prodding or nagging from Owen and I. She has her sights set on a college scholarship (already) and strives to do well in school. 

On Sunday morning, she wants to be on time for church. This often leads to frustration when her siblings or Mom (ahem!) isn't ready. 

She is independent and busy.

She consumes books. I've known her to read an anticipated sequel in a single day.  Just yesterday she brought her book in the car to read at the stop signs and stop lights (she gets motion sick and can't read when the car is moving).

She picked High School track over soccer this spring - a remarkable decision considering her love of soccer. In the end, it came down to coaches she loves, fellow team members, and a sport in which she feels she can truly make a mark. She has trained through the winter months in snow, ice, wind, and rain - a show not just of dedication but of a love of running.

All this striving, studying, and exercising sometimes results in grumpiness and some harsh judgements. But she's working on this.

Her siblings flock around her when she's willing to play. I always know when she's leading an epoch play session from the tell-tale squeals and overall volume which can reach earthquake levels.    

I love to hear late-night whispers and giggling come from Madi's room where I know she and Elise are confiding in each other. 

It's not easy being the oldest. We've talked about this many times. Yes, it's unfair to have to be the eternal Guinea Pig of all our home rules and consequences. But there are privileges too. Late nights, time with friends, trips with me to Bali and NYC, and solo-flights from Indonesia to the US. 

My dear Madi, I am grateful you are my first. My first baby, my first teenager, my first high schooler. You strive and reach. You are an example. You are a joy.

Happy Places in the Dead of Winter

What is your happy Winter place? I'm not talking about a fantasy destination...what is happy in your present life that gets you through the dead of winter?

February is hard. There's a general consensus among my friends that February is the hardest of all the months. Dark. Cold. Things seem to break (aka cars, furnaces, pipes, tree limbs). So while I'm extremely pleased we have made it to March - which has got to be better, right?! - I can't leave behind February without a fight.

February may have hit hard, but there were some happy moments too. Here are my February happy places:

#1 - My Gym! I love Anytime Fitness! My handy dandy fob lets me in anytime I want. I have been there at 5:15AM, braving the snowy streets, just to get in my workout. I love how warm and clean it is. My personal favorite: spin classes with Vicki.

The photo above also represents my #2 Happy Place. I started work at Ocular Melanoma Foundation in January. During the month of February I started working more closely with patients (Warriors!) who want to raise awareness and funds for the organization. It is hard to stay gloomy after talking with these amazing inspirational people. 

Happy Place #3: Music with Charlotte. Charlotte is a cheerful, dancing, singing girl. When the rest of us mope around the house, complaining about the cold, Charlotte sings made up songs about her life. We've heard melodies about cereal, upbeat tempos about her hamster, and ballads about how hard it is when someone is angry at her. It's a constant Charlotte broadway musical.

Happy Place #4 Okay, it's not really a place; it's a day. Madi turned 15 on February 18th! Yes, 15 years old - the heart of teenagehood, the age of most heroines in young adult novels! I surprised Madi by arranging breakfast at Coney Island Diner with some of her friends. Balloons, noise makers, pancakes, maple syrup, and omelettes can turn a normal, cold, wintery day, into a sunny celebration!

So while I'm not sorry to see February go, I'm grateful for these happy places that got me through.

Cold

Because I promised myself I'd write...

After I posted on facebook last week that it was 5 degrees fahrenheit, a Jakarta friend responded with the question, "What does that even feel like?"

Even though I think I gave a smug answer and reminisced about a dip in the KCV pool, I've thought about the question all week long. And here's my answer.

The air grabs me. Steals my breath with the shock. In just the few seconds it takes to shuffle from the front door to the car, my fingers ache, even inside my gloves. I turn the car on and watch the dial, waiting for the magical moment when the needle moves slightly higher than the C...I then turn on the warm air and wait for relief. My skin prickles in the moments between cold and warm. Dry. Itchy. Brittle.

But there are beautiful moments too...

As Madi, Elise and I drive back from Leesburg on President's Day, the sun has set and snow falls. It is not the large, gentle flakes. Instead, the air holds a dense mist of snow. Millions of minuscule snowflakes sparkle like a sky full of silver glitter. Fairy dust. The snow swirls in white patterns against the black asphalt like water in a river. It curves, ripples, and twirls.

We spend our days fighting the cold. I slam the door shut behind me when entering the house, trying to trap in the warm. With the furnace out (of course!) we bundle in wool sweaters and socks. We cuddle and spark. We hover near the fire until our backsides are too hot, and we turn ourselves like marshmallows on a stick, trying to get each surface perfectly toasted. We take turns propping our feet up near the small electric heater.

In the morning, the neighborhood sits quietly under the white blanket. The sky is brighter. But the world is softer somehow.  We go for a walk, our boots crunching the snow. Madi hates the sound. She says it makes her teeth hurt and reminds her of biting a towel. I love the footprints. I love the time between each crunch. The hush of the world.

In the past six months, our family has had little "slowdown" time. I sometimes think one of the ways we've coped with the transition is to fill our calendars too full...giving us very little time to think about what me miss or how things have changed. But the cold has altered our schedule. We linger, we pause, we talk about non-essential things and realize perhaps they ARE the essential things. I hold Charlotte in my arms. I read books aloud to the youngest three and say "yes" to their pleas of "one more chapter!" Later, Madi, Elise, and I read silently snuggling together in my bed with extra covers.

Here are some "Cold" moments: Owen with his snowblower.

 Amelia's selfie in the cold!

Madie and Elise Pre-snow-run

Post-snow Run

What does cold feel like? It hurts - quite brutally painful. But it is wonderfully beautiful too.

To Write or Not to Write?...that is the question

It's been six weeks since I've blogged. Almost a record for me. Sadly, I've only written 9 times since I've been back home in Virginia. And I've been home now for six months!

Each time I consider writing, I think, "What do I possibly have to say that is interesting?" Compared to the past three years of excitement and travel, my current life seems very mundane. Work, school, grocery shopping, chauffeuring, laundry, helping kids with homework, exercising, cooking...just a very simple list.

And so I've decided I have to dig a little deeper. Why do I write? Why did I write in the four years preceding my overseas experience?

And for me, the answers are pretty simple:

#1 My blog is my journal. And my journal is simply a place to record the ups and downs and the events of my life (boring or otherwise). The only people I honestly thought would ever read it were my family and closest friends. Anyone else who chooses to read gets insight (sometimes TMI) into my life. Having an "audience" - even if it is my mom or my children - keeps me feeling connected.

#2 My blog is a chance for me to meditate and create my own history. My story. It is a place where I give myself creative license to re-live and learn from my experiences. I believe very strongly in the power of story - my quote at the top of my blog says it all.

If these are my reasons, then there really should not be any excuse to keep me from writing.

So I'm recommitting myself.

There will not be pictures of exotic foods, new places, and paralytic traffic. But there will be simple moments captured and preserved for me...and anyone else who happens to be interested.

With these thoughts (and a lot of cheerleading from my inner self), here are some highlights from the past week I want to always remember:

For my birthday, I attended Michele Reynolds' date night cooking class. Owen and the rest of the husbands chopped vegetables, cooked the chicken, and really rose to the occasion. Karen and I made these amazing stuffed avocados. We listened to Michele's stories (my favorite was about Terrorist soup) and ate delicious food. Oh food makes me happy. Add friends and stories...possibly my favorite combination.

I keep getting older. Blah. Birthdays past 40 are just a reminder of getting older...unless you have amazing friends who make birthdays a wonderful celebration. I walked into the house to find a Bali themed celebration...batik tablecloth, bamboo straws, and a slideshow of Bali playing on the computer. Of course, I cried.

And then there was the food: spinach salad, quinoa salad, smoothies (even the earthy ones!), and the piece de resistance...chocolate peanut butter cake. Do you see the joy on my face?

I think the most special part of this event is that I've kind of been a recluse these past few months. Maybe it's the cold...maybe it's the age of my children...maybe it's my two jobs...but I just do not socially interact with people as much as I used to. In spite of my somewhat hermit persona, I felt so loved by these ladies.

Actually, my family did an awesome job too. I came home from my gym and the kids had CLEANED THE ENTIRE HOUSE! Best birthday present ever!

Finally, a little about love:

Our family has a tradition of doing a "Love Dinner" on Valentine's Day. Usually, I make a yummy dinner, and Owen and I give Valentine notes to the kids. This year, Elise joined me in the kitchen. We made a Mediterranean chicken served over whole wheat pasta, grilled asparagus, and chocolate dipped strawberries. For dessert, we made these incredible lemon custard tarts. Aren't they beautiful?

I may get grumpy and blue (shall I blame the weather?), but really, I have so much to be grateful for. I love celebrating love. I love when Charlotte says, "Mom you are Awesssssommmme!" (even when I don't feel paticularly awesome). I love when Elise decides to do all the dishes or do a quick organizational task around the house. I love when my son rests his head on my shoulder while we watch a movie. I love seeing Amelia curled up on the couch completely immersed in a book. I love watching Madi reach out and try to cheer up one of her siblings. And I love when my husband buys me white roses...just like he did the day after we became engaged (more than 20 years ago).

Best and Worst

"It was the best of times, it was the worst of times." - albeit cliche, this Dickens' quote seems fitting as I reflect on 2014. There were certainly bests: 

1.  Travel!! (Uganda, Bali with my husband, Yogyakarta with the family, and Utah this summer).

2.  Career (my fantastic spring semester at JIS and starting again with NOVA this fall).

3.  Seeing my children overcome hurdles and find joy.

4.  Renewing friendships. (This is a big one - the one that got me through all the worsts. More on this to come...).

5.  Seeing the miracle of the "Abbe Dream" come true as we purchased land (2.5 acres!) and started building a house.

And there were plenty of "worsts" (I put it in quotes because it's all relative, right?):
1.  Saying goodbye to a place and people I love.

2.  Going from making a good salary to working for pennies.

3.  No more Yuli. Facing the reality of cleaning my own house again has been VERY VERY hard. I've discovered I really do not like cleaning. I know how this sounds. This sounds incredibly spoiled and whiny. But it truly has been a hard transition for me.

4.  My dear, dear mother fighting cancer. I love you Mom!

5.  Living within a budget (cough cough) again - oh the bills, the car break downs, and more bills!

6.  Helping my people adjust to new schools, and having to figure out how to battle my own blues and re-discovering what makes me happy...here.

Back to the #4 of the bests. Truly what has gotten me through all the hard stuff is people.

From the summer with family 

(Luke - your culinary gifts were such a highlight!)

And Katie...I don't know what I would have done without you this summer. Being with you was the BEST!

to Grand Adventures!

 to a Christmas Eve that was filled with beauty, love, and peace...

It comes down to people. Good, amazing people who inspire me. People who are generous with their love and patience. People who contribute to my "bests" and help me get through my "worsts."

I think 2015 will be crazy - selling our house (Fingers crossed!), moving into our finished house (Fingers crossed!), continuing to develop my career (more about this to come), running races, and, of course, spending time with my most favorite people:

Ok 2015...here we go!